Sometimes ya just gotta say "fuck"...

So I have 7 and 1/3 pages on that big 10-page paper. Not bad, considering how dense the subject matter is. I still have more to write about...and I somehow have to incorporate this short story I've been using all semester, but I honestly don't see how.

Regardless of that, I've actually - in a sick and twisted sort of way - enjoyed writing this paper. You see, I knew before this semester began that this class (Critical Theory) would blow chunks. Then I got into the class and it was confirmed that it blew chunks, but it seemed Bullshitable. Then a few weeks passed and it became obvious that it blew so many chunks that it wasn't even Bullshitable. So I actually attempted to apply myself and I paid CLOSE attention to class discussions and to the readings (I even used a fucking highlighter!) and did my damnedest and it STILL blew HUUUUUUUUUGE amounts of chunks.

In other words, I knew the class was going to suck. But I thought I could fake my way through it. Then, when I got a C on the first paper and a D on the mid-term, I realized 'faking' wasn't going to work. So I tried to apply myself and work hard on the second paper, in which I got a C (or, it really looks like a "C-" but my eyes may be deceiving me). So for all that hard work, I still got the same (or lower) bullshit grade that I did on the first paper.

Un-fucking-believable.

After that, I pretty much stopped giving a damn. And I promised myself that in my final paper, no matter what it would cost me in terms of a grade, I would trash not just the class - but the entire field of study - as slickly as possible. Look for yourself:

From my own experiences within English departments, it seems as though the reason critics seem content with this position is because there is a sense of elitism and superiority, in contrast to the rest of society. Critics are ‘smarter,’ critics are ‘better,’ critics just ‘know’ that they could improve society. So they believe the reason they are excluded from the political realm is due to society’s unwillingness to change. With society ‘unwilling to change,’ then society must be unwilling to ‘improve,’ as well, since that is what seems to be propagated by this group.

So I believe these professional critics are their own worst enemy in this regard, as they cause their own isolation. They claim that a lot of language is loaded – ‘freedom’ is a ‘loaded’ term, what’s it really mean? ‘Innocent victims’ versus ‘civilian casualties’ – they’re ‘loaded.’ However, it seems as though critics tend to do quite a bit of ‘loading’ themselves which is unnecessary and confusing – a term is introduced into critical theory, such as ‘ideology,’ which Raymond Williams exposes as a loaded term:

(i) a system of beliefs characteristic of a particular class or group; (ii) a system of illusory beliefs – false ideas or false consciousness – which can be contrasted with true or scientific knowledge; (iii) the general process of the production of meanings and ideas (122).

How can critics take on this authority to ‘unload’ common language, when they can’t even agree on what their own specialized language means?

That's just an example, to show the tone in which I write a majority of the paper. I'm making a point (attempting to, anyway) and yet do it in the prickish way possible, as to show how worthless this class, this field of study (literary criticism), and English departments in general are.

I don't know what kind of "DURR!" moment I was having in 2001 when I decided to enroll at Drake as an English major...I have since changed that to strictly Writing (yet I still suckered myself into this shitty critical theory class) and added TV/Radio - and granted, I'm really fucking stupid when it comes to the TV/Radio stuff...I know a whole lotta nothin' compared to just about everyone else I work with - but TV/Radio is 1) practical and 2) fun. I'm in my fourth year at Drake and in the past year (or so), I've come to realize how absolutely useless English departments are to society and reality. First of all, I do not aspire to be an English professor. Outside of that, English/Writing offers you about...oh...ZERO job possibilities. Becoming a writer is almost impossible and becoming one of these heady, I-have-nothing-better-to-do-than-sit-around-and-pretend-like-I-can-run-society-better-than-society-itself-because-I-understand-"the-language"-and-all-its-connotations-misnomers-and-blatant-hypocrisy critics.

Nothing, though, has made this more apparent than this Critical Theory class. Perhaps I'm not smart enough to understand this type of stuff - if you're reading this and you get off on reading and examining literature and whatever, more power to you...but you're in the minority and quite frankly, nobody else gives a shit.

I'm sort of strange. I'm not smart enough to be part of this intelligent/elite class, yet I'm far from 'normal' and I, therefore, do 'rank' higher than alot of people in society. So even if I don't understand some things, I can see connect with some of this brainy shit...and yet I can also see the average man's point of view. So I'm sort of middle-ground and as the bond that ties these two different sides, the first and foremost thing we must do to draw society closer together, is destroy the English departments!!!

Just kidding.

But seriously, if I could go back to when I enrolled at Drake in the first place, there's no way in Hell I'd get involved in the English department. The only thing it's done for me is helped acquire the required Arts & Science credits needed for completion of my journalism program. And, well, just getting me the required credits needed for graduation in general. 124 credits just can't come outta thin air and with my thin tastes, there's no way I could come up with enough classes in 4-5 years to reach 124 credits. So, thanks English department, for forcing me to take more required classes that I otherwise would have not taken.

Well, I've wasted half an hour typing this (which was much easier, to be honest) as opposed to working on that paper (again, honestly, in the past 30 minutes...had I worked on the paper, I probably would've produced a total of three sentences).

I bid you fine folks of BloggerLand good night.